Noisy Incontinent Human Card - SUPER SECONDS

Why it's in the sale: altered design printed on discontinued cardstock.

Little Noisy Incontinent Human Greeting Card - illustrated by Claire Senior

"Welcome to the world, little noisy, incontinent, human" As far as newborn baby cards go, this one certainly isn't sugarcoating the pill. Let's face it, by the time the new parents receive your card, they'll be well on their way to calling their newborn this very long-winded phrase... or maybe something shorter with more expletives! Send this card to the parents with a (very quickly decreasing) sense of humour, and help them smile for a split second before going back to changing nappies!

This funny new baby card is printed in the UK onto 250gsm Rives Shetland board. It comes with a cream envelope.

Card size (A6): 10.5cm x 14.8cm

We ship UK wide and globally (Sorry, we cannot currently ship to the EU).

Shipping costs for 1-2 cards:

 We ship orders daily, Monday through Friday (our daily cutoff for posting out is 11am), except on bank and national holidays.

Royal Mail First Class

If you have placed your order before 11am on a weekday, your order will normally be shipped the same day. Over 80% of all Royal Mail first class post arrives the next working day, however this is not a guaranteed or tracked service, and sometimes it will take a little longer.

Royal Mail Second Class

If you place your order before 11am on a weekday, your order will normally be shipped the same day. Second class post takes 2-5 days to be delivered. This is not a guaranteed or tracked service and mail can sometimes take longer to arrive at its destination. 

Next Day Special Delivery (UK Only) 

If you place your order before 11am (Monday-Thursday) and select Next Day Delivery, you order will arrive with your recipient, guaranteed, before 1pm the next working day. Please note that someone has to be in to sign for the package. This service does not operate on Bank Holidays or weekends.

FREE Postage

When you select the FREE postage option at checkout, your order will be sent by untracked second-class Royal Mail.

Local Pick-Up

Local to Nottingham NG15 8HT and want to pick your order up from us? That's great! Please follow these instructions:

• At checkout, please type free shipping code: OnlyValidForLocalPickUp into the coupon box. If you use this code and you're not local, someone will contact you for postage costs before your order ships.
• Once your order is marked as dispatched, you can pick it up from our address: 3, Olympia Way, Hucknall, NG15 8HT.
• Pick-up is available Monday, Wednesday and Friday between 5-7pm. If you need to pick up your order outside these times, please let me know as this can often be accommodated!
• We will bring your order out to you and maintain social distancing if the climate requires it!
• If you're a cheeky sausage and use the local pick up code and you're not local, someone will contact you for postage payment. 

A signature is not required for deliveries apart from:

If UK customers order Next Day Special Delivery. A signature is required for this delivery. We may send orders over £60 by recorded delivery.

General Delivery Terms

Where possible, all our orders are dealt with on a daily basis, so turnaround for delivery within the UK will usually be within 3-5 days, often sooner. Europe delivery time should be 7-10 days and the Rest of the World delivery should be 2-3 weeks. All UK orders should be received within 21 days and International orders within 4 weeks. In the instance that an item is out of stock the customer will be informed and given further options.

For more in-depth shipping and returns info, please visit Shipping and Returns